Things that can go wrong when you are 24


The curse of being a human is that every year you dread that one day, which is supposed to be your most happy day, which will change the complete dynamics of your life and bring you closer towards a stark realization, 'You are not getting younger.'


Every year has a different story to tell, like age one, 'Hey big dudes, I no longer wet my pants.'

Or age three you manage to speak the first letter of vocabulary, 'Mama' making your parents proud.

At age 10 you sneak a peak at the girls in school (ok maybe I started early, but generally its there), you fight with them.

The next year you wear full pant in school and finally the feeling of getting exposed reduces.

Then comes the era of co-ed school, the attraction, the confusion and the mas-- which brings you to your teen age. The age of pimples, parties and pants, yup those worn out torn out pants, to the dismay of your mother who constantly reminds you that we are not beggars, but you try to convince its the in thing now.

Teen usually ends by 18 or by twenties and you come to the happening generation. You see, India gives you married license after 21  but the fact that you might be available for marriage takes three years to digest, which brings us to 24.

Now the only good thing about 24 is that it is not 25, twenty five when the standing male life starts disintegrating. Where your parents want to see you get married and when every girl you have known from your class, is either married, pregnant or engaged or lesbian (in short, if you did not choose soon, you are done for life, then marry the Savatri your parent chooses, always a bad idea)

Actually speaking 24 actually does not do anything, it tells you worst is coming soon. Like you are standing naked in the middle of the desert and suddenly hear a stampede or a cloud of dust at the horizon. Your whole life ends, the moment you see that dust, now there is a likely chance that the stampede is not going to hit you...but you know the creepy feeling?

Its like tied to the electric pulley which is gradually pulling you towards the hot furnace. 24 is not the furnace, 24 is the pulley, the buffer time between 'single and ready to mingle' and 'single and looking'

The first worst thing hitting on your doorstep is the marriage invitation. And so does the plague starts, your first crush, your best friend, that girl in the class you were sure is eyeing you, they politely send a wedding invitation to your inbox inviting you to come. The wedding invitation just sits there like a time bomb ticking away...tick tick tick. Now its not that I do want to have those girls, no, but you its just like a girl less for me to marry, choice reduces. Like you are losing the race.

If the ticking bomb in email is not enough, there are rocket launcher pointing at you, your girl-friend asks you the five dreaded words in the dictionary of relationships, 'Where-is-this-relationship-going?' No, no, she doesn't want marriage, which I learned after a hard lesson of avoiding her for three days, nope, she wants commitment. A time period when will be best for us to marry, will it be next year? two years later? three years later or Dude, I am starting to lose by patience, my father already found my soul mate. Which is actually an challenge, own up or lose me.

Your mother gives a emotionally blackmailing lecture on how dad has only few years for retirement but still works hard for the house and how I am not yet responsible.
How 'other' kids (the same one who ruined my childhood by scoring 99% in exams, 99% gawd, what are you? Book eaters? or lunatics? Dude who takes exams seriously? What did you do your whole life, study?) are now well settled and how I still do not clean my room.

Little toddlers around your building shout at you, 'Uncle, ball do na,' as depressing, boring and highly middle aged the ring of uncle sound,  you suddenly realize that people who played with you now have babies, so they become mommy and daddy and you become uncle. Which sucks btw.

Now these dreaded things happening around I realized one more biggest torture moment, the digestive system grows up and then you have to eat properly. No more gulping beer with a complete chicken. Nope. You do have the same old passion to eat but after like half chicken the stomach replies, 'No more.' Dude? hello? We were best budies for life? Bhool gaya sholay ki dosti? (as in did you forget the friendship, can't explain Sholay in English, see the film.)

You watching Ben ten lying on the couch, eating a packet of potato chips, which was earlier considered just lazy, becomes immature, irresponsible, horrible and disgusting, increase in the adjectives for the same activity you are doing for past fifteen years.

Soon a creeping sensation comes into your mind which forms a though in your brain, where the hell is your life headed?

Ok, seriously as horrible as this question sounds, the answer hits you with a even more horrible realization, life is headed to age 25. Gosh, halfway there.

As Murphy's law states, anything that can go wrong will always go wrong and here I am, I am 24.

Oww.

That hurts.

35 comments

  1. i dont care what YOU think it is like being 24! i want to be too...and end up studies and exams! like always this post had many ROFL-moments :P
    happy bday! hav fun! keep ossuming ;)

    :)

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  2. @Neha
    trust me babes... u do not want to come up here. Thank you Thank you...:D

    ReplyDelete
  3. Haha.. :P agree about peopel getting married and having kids. But I really pity those people who get married without even enjoying life alone :)

    ReplyDelete
  4. Happy Birthday Sid :)
    Have fun and enjoy every moment of your special day.

    Cheers!!

    ReplyDelete
  5. @Avada
    Yaar, we pity re...but our parents don't...our parents think they lead a better life than us...;)

    ReplyDelete
  6. hahaha. nice witty one. Many similarities other than the fact that you are four years senior to me in looking at girls.

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  7. @Bharathi
    I was born naturally unnatural...;)

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  8. HAPPY BIRTHDAY!

    yeah im definitely "standing naked in the middle of the desert and suddenly hear a stampede or a cloud of dust at the horizon".

    Twenties blow in general- you finally realize that you're not in school anymore, and that you actually have to live life and do shit, and it just makes you want to die.

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  9. Lol how true!
    Did I ever tell you I feel like a wrinkled old lady while hanging out with my group of 18 year-old friends? XD
    Life's hard no?
    Btw I also seem to have a phobia for marriages.Whenever I get an invitation to someone's wedding I am surrounded with the feeling of impending doom....I am like 'ugh I feel so sorry for those two.Their lives are finished for good.'
    (I was never endowed with a normal girl's thinking process *snicker*)
    But I don't think 24 is the age to start thinking about marriage..atleast not in case of a guy.
    *sigh* you GUYS are lucky!

    P.S:Happy Birthday again Sid!

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  10. Nice one SiD, now just take it a year ahead and you'll nearly get how I feel... Like watching your whole life go by, in super-slow-motion. I hear ya bro.

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  11. Great One SiD...

    Many Happy Returns of d day!!
    Hope You had a great time..and may you keep on writing such great pots..

    I passed my "am Not getting Younger stage" couple of years back..
    Can totally relate to the feeling of things changing around you..

    Great witty post..

    =))

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  12. @Cheryl
    Hey don't be such a saddist... being miserable is part and parcel of life.. So we have to face it with a brave face,

    I know you have done it...:D

    ReplyDelete
  13. @Sammy
    I know its too early for a guy to think for marriage, but you know the world is cruel, they need fix time and date.

    And every step you take, they keep on asking you...dude, whats next?

    I mean, hullo, I have reached here. Let me breathe. :P

    ReplyDelete
  14. @nesquarx.com
    Thanks for the good words buddy...:D

    ReplyDelete
  15. @Dev
    Its a promise bro... I am going to write many more ossum post...:D

    ReplyDelete
  16. Happy Birthday Sid !! 24 is much better... lol than 33 !!!!

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  17. @Hitchwriter
    Yeah it can be...but u know every age has its thing...;)

    Welcome 2 sidoscope...:D

    ReplyDelete
  18. =))

    Ha! Ha! Yet another fine entertaining post.

    "Book eaters"

    You have coined a new word... patent it and contact the Oxford English Dictionary fellows... pronto!

    ReplyDelete
  19. oh well....quarter life crisis is what u're heading towards. but dont worry, the best of us get it! if i can hav it at 22, it is only fair that u hav it at 24 at least :P

    happy birthday to you! hope the party is in full swing :D

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  20. @Roshmi
    :D Thank you Roshmi...:D yaar but the oxford once hate me as I used their dictionary as cushion...:P

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  21. @Nikita
    Thank you Thank you thank you...:D Its not exactly a crisis...but m totally afraid...:D

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  22. Silly uncle who is 24.. lol.. You know what, it hurts me too. Almost, all the girls in my class are married and I'm still Single. But thats what I chose. Their kids call me aunty too :(( I hate it but I have to go with the flow. BTW, Happy birthday.. I was too busy with Pongal at home today.. Sorry dude.. Tell me all about your 24th birthday celebration later..:))

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  23. @Raji
    U call me uncle one more time...and u r blocked forever...:P

    Thank you for your wishes you were not late :D

    I will tell about all the nightmares i had...:P

    ReplyDelete
  24. Sorry I am late, Happy Birthday Siddhesh (belated though). Here is a nice birthday song for you...


    HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU... HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU..

    YOU WERE BORN IN A ZOO...
    WITH MONKEYS AND DONKEYS...

    AND YOU'RE ONE OF THEM TOO.....

    =))
    .
    .
    .
    .
    shilpa

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  25. :P hey sorry for the bad bad b'day song, actually I have become evil in your company, but see still have little goodness left in me. so here's the nice one.
    HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU SIDDHESH! :) GOD BLESS YOU!!
    .
    .
    .
    Shilpa

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  26. lolllllll soooo does this mean you're going to be getting married soon?? hahaha

    happy birthday, birthday boy ;)
    age really is just a number, except if you're cheese
    xxx

    ReplyDelete
  27. @Shilpa
    Ok ok...that bad birthday song covers the belated wishes...thank you...:D

    ReplyDelete
  28. @Manju
    naahhhii...just wen i digest one blow u r in for another one...:O

    No no no...no marriage...for 2 years...:D

    ReplyDelete
  29. hahhaha..Happy Bday Sid..I could see the hindi film scene rolling before my eyes as I read what u wrote...cool..Thats everybodys story ()except for those 99% creatures)

    Hope ur having a good year...

    ReplyDelete
  30. Every sentence I read up there had “You Bet!!! It happens…” apart from “LOL”.

    I think parents never forget those student/kids who were ahead of us… even if someday we forget them, parents never miss an opportunity to remind us about ‘how good they were…and how well they are doing’

    Anyway.. this post confused me whether to wish you for your birthday or to console you for the same :P

    Well.. I only hope that this year becomes the memorable one for you :)

    Hope you had fun!!

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  31. @Dil
    Thank you thank you...D

    i am having a great year so far...;)

    ReplyDelete
  32. @Garmina
    Yeah... u can wish me for now and send your condolences later...:P

    ReplyDelete

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