My name is...
Since ages the name game is just below the blame game. Because to blame someone you need to name someone. Hence naming a name is more important that work.
Some names become too famous, that they are echoed through out the ages, like Mahatma Gandhi. This name is so overrated that after every three blocks you find a Mahatma Gandhi road, Mahatma Gandhi chowk, Mahatma Gandhi kinara.
A few days ago I was sipping tea in the Mahatma Gandhi tea stall (I am not sure if any member of Gandhi family has inaugurated or owned or even know about this tea stall) I asked the chai wala, 'Mohandas Gandhi ko janate ho?' (Do you know Mohandas Gandhi)
'Kaun?' (who) the man asked me, 'Is he new Gandhi president?'
Holy.. I dropped the hot tea and burned my fingers. Now those who do not know (which is a shame if you are an Indian) Mohandas Karamchand Gandhi was the name of Mr. Mahatma Gandhi.
Some names are weapons of mass destruction, usually the ones from south India. Gopi from my office was known by all as Gopi, he never told anyone anything else. But I a very interesting incident brought his real name into picture.
Gopi was driving in the no-entry lane in Pune (they are so many that you sometimes tend to loose track) when he was caught by a traffic cop (who was doing something behind a tree)
'Where are you going?' he asked.
'Going, sir please let me go,' Gopi said.
'Nothing doing, tell me your name,' the cop removed the tattered book to give a ticket.
'Gopichettipalayam Nagakundilachucallepericati Kumarvellam Iyer,' said Gopi politely.
For half a minute the cop was quiet and then he said, 'Ok ok, don't do it again. I am letting you go because it is your first time.'
Weapon of mass destruction you see, I wonder who in his right mind would want such a big name.
Some names are too common to the irritation of their owners like Neha, Priya, Rahul, Amit.
Every third girl you meet on the street has name Priya, while the second one has name Neha.
Similarly every person in India happens to know atleast one Rahul and one Amit, however only one Rahul per person is not a limitation.
I know a Neha who was shouting like hell on Valentines Day because she received too many flowers in her hostel. She had no problems in receiving the flowers, the problem was they were not for her and she had a lot of explaining to do to the delivery boy as well as her boyfriend about the name problem.
Some family names become very popular through ages, like in India, Gandhi is the biggest brand sold in political outfits. Likewise Khan, Bacchan, Kumar are the brand sold in the films.
Similarly there are many famous brand names in India like the Thackarey, Godse, Joshi.
These names are as controversial as they are popular.
My friend was Lal, now his tragedy in life was that he came from a distant village in Bihar with the popular surname, however his father chose to name him Lal as in Red. Now he was definitely human nor was a red head but his name was Lal.
Madhu was a very good and close friend, however the tragedy in his life was he was he but he was named as a she.
In Punjab I hear names are very complicated like Parminder, can you forget the Parminder family in Khichadi TV serial? The whole family had a running name Parminder?
Some names are totally confusing like Kiran, Suhas these names are applied to females as well as males. I always dread that at some point of time I will be invited to a wedding where Kiran weds Kiran, and I am not sure if it will be straight marriage or a gay marriage.
Some names have controversy written on them hear this, in a hostel room no. 666 the room mates ate Thackarey and Yadav, can you digest it? I can't.
Recently Mr. Khan announced to the world My name is Khan, ok, point taken I won't ask your name again and I hope no airport will deport you and check you like they did before.
So you see, when Shakespeare asked 'What is there in the name' in the 16th century, little did he know that he will receive such tremendous answers in the 21st century.
Well my name is Sid aka Ravan aka Siddhesh Kabe, what is yours?
When not writing, he is often seen cycling in hunt for good coffee or having pointless argument with random people on varied subjects. He can be reached on twitter @_siddhesh or his websitehttp://www.siddhesh.co.
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