'Alpha team, fall in,' barked the commander. All the three people surrounded her, head lowered, whispering so that only they can hear her instructions.
'Time check, are all the watches synchronized?' she raised her wrist to show exact 1800 hours. They all nodded their approval.
'Mission brief, do all of you have the assets list?' she questioned, they all nodded showing the paper list.
'Yes,' he said in a bored tone.
'Am I clear, Cadet?' she barked.
'Yes, Captain,' he barked.
'Ok, boys, this is it, this is no drill, lets shop!!!'
And the complete family, mom, dad and two sons dispersed themselves into the end-of-season-sale at the mall.
Ever felt the need of special men retreat corner in the mall? Ever wondered how you ended up buying a bed-sheet, when you had simply gone to buy a handkerchief?
I decided to pull off a Newton and sit under a apple tree to ponder over the questions (I was actually sitting there so that I could not face the Amex bill lying unopened on my doorstep), waiting for the apple to fall so I can pick it and make apple juice out of it (Apple rates are very high in mall, sacchi!!) when I uncovered the reality.... The ultimate conspiracy theory of all time, the conspiracy of world domination in form of mall!!!
It all began in the olden society when Mrs. and Mr. Stonehead where strolling in the garden of Eden, when Mrs. Stonehead saw the leaf of Banana tree and she though, 'Hey that can cover me up more than this single leaf. This way I can hold my husband ransom for buying me anything to show my body.'
What happened next was the conspiracy of the entire human race for world domination, for wanting a better term I dubb it the green conspiracy, female all over the place starting picking up leaves from the trees and covering themselves up.
So when, faced with the problem Mr. Einstone then invented the whirling wind, a super power full hand held device (Stone age generation iPod) which would blow off the leaves and leave their wifes exposed.
Of course man also underestimated woman, so they really didn't know what to do when females started stitching their clothes to keep a firm grip on themselves. Now, not all females had the time to keep stitching you know, some even had to watch the horrible human torture on television so someone decided to start a mall, yes a mall, a place where womans can shop.
Like all the successful inventions in the world, like the nuclear bomb or the toaster we could not control what we create and the mall grew, like Frankenstein monster waiting for you to enter it to gulp you down in one go.
'Ono, mall has costly rates,' you say.
'Welcome, end of month sale,' he shouts and yay you run there screaming.
The curse of mall grew, grew to the extend that humanity could not control it. So after tearing down ten different shops, dragging him across the a stretch of thirty kilometers in a single mall, wasting around three hours, when Bubbly finally found a dress for herself, she said to Bunty, 'Now see the shop over there, go buy that T-Shirt for yourself and come back in a minute while I look for shoes.'
The conspiracy theory of the mall.
Window shopping, another misconceived plan of the global conspiracy of world domination of the mall, previously we used to believe that if you have money, go to the mall, but now it is not so, even if you don't have money see what all items are on the display and then plan, plot your program to max-out the credit card.
You see friends, we humans are fragile, we come and go and then come back and then go back and then we come back again and then we go back again, but everytime we come back, we see there is a 50% sale at the mall and then we decide to go and we go back and then we see there is 70% sale at the other mall and we go back again to the extent that one day.... (shss don't say it out loud or the mall will hear it) we become m-a-l-l z-o-m-b-i-e-s.
Yes thats right, the curse of the mall continues.
I am going underground, because the mall monster is going to come after me pulling down into the Molly Jones locker or the fourth floor of the mall (yes the deserted fourth floor, where people are locked up and tortured until they cave in and buy stuff from the same mall until eternity or the end of season sale, whichever is sooner)