Maid in India

It was one of those weeks in my house when my partner and I were too lazed out to go grocery shopping. Every passing day the number of onions, and tomatoes started depleting and we were slowly entering the dark era. Our maid gave a constant reminder of the upcoming apocalypse but since it was morning 7:30, a time before we normally wake up, all those warnings fell on deaf ears, nay on sleepy deaf ears.

Finally, one fine day making a very inaudible noise she walked towards us and declared that the end of the world was here and she could not cook anything. At that precise moment, my mind went into a self-doubt mode on exactly who was the employee and who was the employee. But this was not the first time my mind went into the overdrive of self-doubt.

A few weeks back, when my wife had gone to her native, our doorbell rang horribly five to six times, disturbing my sweet dreams of world domination. The people had almost started worshipping me in my dream when the doorbell kicked me out of the giant podium, and I had to reluctantly open the door,

"Where were you?" asked the maid as she took charge of the house.
"I...ugh... sleeping," I said, still yawning; I do not know if there was any other possible response at 6:30 in the morning.
"So late in opening the door, were you out again last night?" she asked.
For a freaking moment, I thought I was still asleep and this was my wife inquiring about my whereabouts. I opened my eyes wide, but no, it was the maid.
"Ugh... I..." in one freighting moment I had forgotten the entire vocabulary of Hindi.

The list does not end here, in my house the chain of command begins with my wife and in her absence, it is handed over to the maid. Apparently, as the husband, I come at the very bottom of the chain of command pyramid in the house.

"Can you come a bit late from tomorrow?" my partner pleaded with the maid one fine morning. After ruining our sleep for seven consecutive days, we came up with the solution.
"No, can't do," the maid said, "I have only a 7:30 slot free for your house. I have to work elsewhere, and it is already booked."
"Can you switch us to another slot? Say after 10:30?"
"No," the maid replied firmly, "And I will take a holiday every Monday, whether you like it or not."
She announced firmly and went ahead to do her regular job. An hour later, when I tried to show the same firmness to my boss, he reprimanded me for coming late to the office and insisted I come on time. So much for a chain of command.

How we met our maid is also an interesting story in itself. It was 7 hours since we moved into our new house, 6 out of those seven were spent sleeping as we moved in late last night. Early morning at 7:30, the doorbell rang, and on the door was the maid. "I used to work in this house earlier, do you need a maid?" We needed one definitely but had never decided on it. I think it was mostly the sleep deprivation that we agreed on one.

Having a maid is as horrible as not having one. But the most horrible part of it is having one and she not coming on time. Never before have we waited for anyone more than the maid to arrive. Having a maid in India is as good as having a very uncomfortable raincoat in the rain. While a raincoat is a necessity, it is still uncomfortable having one.

What are your woes?


  1. hahaha.. I never thought ill see a post about Maid Problems from you :P
    And I can so relate to some of the incidents here.

  2. In our house, we have to open the door within 5-6 seconds of the maid's arrival. Otherwise she just leaves and tells us next day that no one was there in the house!

    Destination Infinity


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